One of my main focuses in coaching is increasing both the awareness & levels of self-care. Why? Because people want to feel better, happier, more engaged, in other words, they wish to experience more Well-Being and tending to the Self is a necessary pre-step for any kind of success in life.
In my previous blog I introduced the subject of the Theory of Well Being and how the pneumonic PERMA helps us remember the components of such construct, as a quick reminder:
• Positive Affect: Refers to positive feelings, pleasure, the hedonistic life
• Engagement: Refers to flow, being deeply engaged with the present moment
• Relationships: Creating and enjoying positive relationships
• Meaning: Belonging to and serving something larger than your Self
• Accomplishment: Pursuing success, achievement, and mastery in your endeavors for its own sake
The goal of such theory is to increase Flourishing in your own life and the planet by increasing PERMA, and ideally using your strengths throughout the whole process to maximize its effects. *
So then, what makes us Flourish?
The University of Cambridge took on the task of defining and measuring Flourishing in each of the 23 European Union nations, and their definition in the spirit of the well-being theory is:
“To flourish, an individual must have all of the Core Features + at least 3 of the Secondary Features:
Core Features
Positive emotions
Engagement
Interest
Meaning
Purpose
+
Secondary Features
Vitality
Self esteem
Self determination
Resilience
Optimism
Positive relationships
What I find most satisfying about “growing up” is the injection of consciousness into the whole process. We all want to become better, to evolve, but often we get lost in a journey to nowhere because we have not inflicted awareness and prepared for it.
Tip number 1: It is always more effective to deliberately participate in your own growth and expansion by becoming the creator and not the spectator (only) of your life experience.
So when you resolve is time to do/change something because you hear a gentle knocking (sometimes not so gentle) and make the choice to listen, honoring “that” is what I called Self-Care; when you tend to that need, you have fulfilled the very important step of acknowledging the existence of something larger than your physical body: the calling of the soul.
So now what? We got the knock; we’ve opened the door, and ☺ ☹, yes, I hear ya’, both exciting and terrifying…
To get you started I am offering you some of my favorite tips, these are some principles that really work for me, try them out for something you really wish to achieve or implement in your live, you might be surprised about the outcome:
PREPARE
Embarking on new, successful endeavors requires work. The more prepared you are, the less surprises and more thriving venturing on. Doing something new, undertaking new habits & rituals requires a lot of determination and energy at the beginning, so by smoothing out the pathway to the new normal you avoid thinking too much, and therefore giving up.
It also makes it more interesting and fun, it’s like that first day of school, if you had new bags, pens, and laid out the outfit the night before, you were far more excited than if you had to run and deal with everything in the morning making the whole experience extra stressful, and adding more stress while trying to change is by no means of any help.
Suggestions:
1. Wind down on Sunday afternoon; use that time to prepare for the week.
2. Write down the vision for the week.
3. Have a written monthly, weekly, and daily calendar.
4. Plan anything that can be done in advance at this time, decide on menus, write down the ingredients, exercise routine, priorities, anything you can think of.
5. Once you have filled up the schedule, make time for “down time” and self-care. If there isn’t any space for it, remove something non-essential. In order to create more of what you want, something’s gotta give.
6. Every evening write down the Intention for the following day.
7. Prep the night before: journal, clothes, ingredients, trainers etc. Have them ready.
8. Review your schedule/intention in the morning; adjust as required. “Intention directs attention, Attention creates reality”
And remember, “planning is priceless, planning is useless” so be flexible and have fun!
ENHANCE
We all love beauty. Full Stop. Beautiful things inspire us, move us, make us want to be better; they warm our hearts, and uplift us. From nature to clothes, there is no limit. When preparing for success, surround yourself with beauty. First tune in and see what inspires you, then take action based on the feeling, not the thinking. Let’s say you’d like to start juicing, search for some pretty recipes & ingredients, think of beach tropical or snowy warm cinnamon, whatever flicks your switches, go on and buy them!
If you have prepared, and you have beauty ready to come out, it is unlikely that you’ll reject the challenge.
INVEST
I personally find that when I invest on something, when I spend a little bit more than I am comfortable with, I take extra care of things. As simple as that, if I have spent money on something I love, I will make use of it. So, continuing on the juicing front, get a kick ass juicer, spend more than you would usually do, if exercising is your goal, sign up for yoga glow, get a personal trainer, invest on some really good trainers, if working on your Self, get a coach, go to a workshop, study something. Invest in your Self as if it was the last thing you had to do in this lifetime. Tip Number 2:When you think you cannot afford it, it is when you really need to push through.
EXECUTE
One of the biggest fallacies out there, and please pay attention to this because it is fundamental for your own growth, is that we have to feel like doing something in order to do it. (That was tip 3)
I am passionate about what I do, I love my Work, but sitting down to write, plan, create, requires commitment and discipline. The moment I snap out of it, it takes me a lot more effort to get back to it.
So when you get that feeling of “I have to do this but”… this is when you have to give it all, to break through the saboteur, this is where the juice is ☺. Pay attention to that feeling, acknowledge it, thank “It” and move forward, one step at a time, to the other side of the tunnel. You are right now in the middle, you can see the light at the end, but if you stop here, you might never get to see the other side, and believe me, is totally worth it.
So c’mon puppies!
You are off to great places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So… get on your way!
Dr. Seuss
*Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being. Martin E.P Seligman
Do you need support reaching out for your dreams, clarifying your purpose, moving forward? Contact me, let’s have a 30 minute complimentary call and take it from there!
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